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Tuesday, July 10, 2007

The next Reminder video (written by the viewers) - check it out

Bismillah ar-Rahmaan ar-Raheem,


A little while ago, I told the viewers that if they write a Reminder video script together, I would film and edit it InshAllah. Well, after 1100 votes later, the results of the voting poll was "Boyfriend/Girlfriend" as the topic. Then the viewers got together on a Facebook group and put together the following script.

Please check it out post your comments (try to post constructive criticism not just criticism :) JazakAllah khair!

********************

How do you boil a frog? Well, if you put a frog in a pot of boiling water, he'll jump out (frogs are good jumpers). (Tarra Young)

What you do is to put the frog in cool water, room temp. Gradually you turn the heat up bit by bit and bye bye froggy. (Halimah bint David)

This just shows how fast things can go towards the wrong direction, even when you think things are going fine. (snaa sagheer) [can you tape this part fast forwarding it quickly in the wrong direction then slowly repeating it almost like you did in 25,000 weddings?)

Gradually we compromise on the very basic aspects of our beliefs, blurring the truth from the false. What is left? Opinions dominate our beliefs and we become overrun with justifications for our deviant actions. (Le-Ann Lue-Fatt aka Mariam)

You know this reminds me of a story of a man called Barsisa.
(Halimah bint David

A man turns from a monk to worshiping Allah (SWT) then to a murderer, subhanallah. Small sparks are what start up a raging fire.
(Snaa Sagheer)

Barsisa a very pious man, 3 brothers who were going to war, trusted Barsisa with the protection of their sister. (Yaseen Hussain)

The three brothers left their sister in his trust without hesitation. (Le-Ann Lue-Fatt)

Shaitan told Barsisa to take responsibility, for if the girl was not with him she would be with some other untrustworthy man.(Adaweya Diab)

She then stayed in a vacant house, apart from the monastery where Barsisa was living and never left it. (Mehnaz Hossain)

Gradually, shaytan leads Barsisa, to talk to the 'lonely' woman and then enter her house until they had committed zina (Reem Masri AKA Reemo Supreemo)

The sister than, became pregnant and Shaytan lead Barsisa to kill the child and the sister out of fear of being caught. (Yu Brother)

The brothers later, learned of the monk’s deed of killing their sister and her baby, they snatched the monk and took him to the leader of the land. Shaitan came to the monk and said, "if you make sujood to me, I will make this all go away." the monk bowed down to shaytan. and the man was immediately killed by the ruler.
(Sabeen Shamail)


Sound familiar to todays news events, talking of lost pregnant woman, only to find them and their babies have been killed?

The world used to look up to the muslims, respect them, copy them and now? Muslims are left with shame on their faces, copying and respecting the west because they have left Islam and do not know tauheed.( (Reem Masri AKA Reemo Supreemo) (Can you do some kind of hand clapping and whistling while acting as a shy muslim in thobe, then alternate it for someone dressed very kuffar and picking their nose (or something)?)

People change their girlfriends and boyfriends all the time like they change their socks! [JOKE!JOKE!] (Yu Brother)

What is this with Muslims thinking its halal to date? It's like they're in denial. You know what I'm saying? (Zainab Khan)

In Eastern societies, people think it is justified to have a 'fiancé' thing going on in front of their parents, when in secret it’s a 'boyfriend-girlfriend' thing.
(Huma Munir)

Upon finding out, Parents so fearful, of being shamed in front of their community practise honor killings. (Monwara Rahman)

Prophet (saw) said "When a man and a woman are in seclusion, the third companion is Shaytan. Shaytan is a open enemy. (khalid hassan)
...
So here’s a question: "What is the purpose of dating?"
all it does is bring us closer to Jahaanam, in the same way the frog is tricked into being slowly boiled,(Amer)

What is the purpose of dating, then breaking up, then finding someone new, then breaking up? Repeat as often as necessary until exhaustion takes over (joke joke) [Actually do and say]. (Noushin Karim)

We should be trying to find a life partner, not going endlessly through a revolving door. (Hanif Demi)

There is a purpose and reason for everything we do Islamically. (Aysha Masood Khan)

Do what Allah's messenger (saw) prescribed, resist the temptations of attraction by lowering your gaze and fasting. (afreen)

Parents, encourage your child to marry as soon as they show interest in the opposite sex, to protect their chastity and honor. Don’t wait for them to be the age of grandparents. (redo scene from 25000, weddings “but I’m your dad!” “Yeah whate ever you say Grandpa!”.(Abu Taimyyah)

This Ali reminding you just in case you forgot, This is Ali reminding you just in case you forgot.

At the end show this written down on piece of paper, maybe?

Allah says "Do not go NEAR Zina"...he doesn’t say don’t DO zina (because many people don’t intend to), but he says dont even go NEAR it!!!
(Zulakha Raja

****************************

806 words with out stage direction and names it’s a little over 700, probably 720 word count.
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64 Comments:

At July 10, 2007 9:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

erk.. actually, to date or not to date?

salam!

 
At July 10, 2007 9:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Salamz....
Good effort but to be honest it does not flow...still looks very choppy and all over the place. The stories does not really address the topic.

 
At July 10, 2007 10:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

salam

I think to read sth is totally different than to see or hear it?? You know what I mean? I think these are good ideas.. but it would be nice to mention clearly that it is haram for both -boys and girls- most brothers think" oh i cant get pregnant so its ok for me.. but when i marry i want a wife who is wearing hijab practicing and never been close to another man..." parents and most of muslim society accept this argumentation...thats why brothers show themselves with a girl in public places and sisters dont(because they fear their parents and defaming)...tradition is becoming more important than religion most families are only about" My daughter needs to be "clean" and no one should talk about our familiy..." maybe this video makes our ummah THINK..
Salam

 
At July 10, 2007 10:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think it is very good, masha Allah. A real masterpiece with excellent style, content and flow. Great Work everybody!

 
At July 10, 2007 10:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i spose i agree with the FIRST anonymous person too, the whole thing about "its haram for oth -boys and girls- and the thing to do with the culture/tradition only thnkn about the girl wen its equally important fr the guy too...

 
At July 10, 2007 10:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

bt yh the post is greatt :D and i wrote a bit of it too hehe yay

 
At July 10, 2007 10:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

oops, not the first anonymous person, the second (bscly the one with the longer entry)

 
At July 10, 2007 10:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Salams,
I thnk the script is rrllyy ggdd :D but jst wntd 2 mke a slight tweak/suggestion on my two lines:
What is the purpose of dating, then breaking up, then finding someone new, then breaking up? Repeat as often as necessary until exhaustion takes over (joke joke) [Actually do and say]. (Noushin Karim)
U c the part where it says "Repeat as often as necessary until exhaustion takes over", that wouldnt realy sound ryt or make sense if u SAID that, but it would sound funnier and mke more sense if it is done as a screen action, so Ali would jst b like
"What is the purpose of dating, then breaking up, then finding someone new, then breaking up, then finding someone new, then breaking up, then finding someone new, then breaking up..." and is done LITERALLY until exhaustion takes over...and then jst for an extra laugh, Ali could go "JOKE!!"
So this is basically the line, with my added suggestion/tweak:
What is the purpose of dating, then breaking up, then finding someone new, then breaking up, the finding someone new, then breaking up? [Repeat as often as necessary until exhaustion takes over -Actually do this]. (Noushin Karim)
JazakAllah Khair - Alhamdulillah scripts good tho, and yh u cld add somthin about the whole tradition thing 2 do with girls and clearly say tht girls and boys r equal to make it GGREEAAATT :D This ones gna b a laugh i tell u...

 
At July 10, 2007 10:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry, not that boys and girls r EQUAL coz we alrdy knw tht, bt that its equally wrong fr either of them to have a bf/gf.
JA K

 
At July 10, 2007 10:59 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asalamualaikum wahrehmatullahi wahbarakatuhu
In my honest opinion, theres some major tweaking to be done to that script, to make it a) flow and b) get the point across before putting everyone to sleep.

I get the idea tho... and im liking the general array of ideas.

Masha'Allah

Wa'alaikum asalaam wahrehmatullahi

 
At July 10, 2007 12:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

mashallah, that sounds really good!

 
At July 10, 2007 2:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

As salaamu alaykum,
Well, it's not bad but it's not great.
I didn't get the whole frog thing at first but than it made sense.
What I'm saying is the beginning isn't great but the rest is quite good.
And it takes a while for the humor, but it later becomes very funny.
But don't change it completely there are many good points.
I hope you're not offended I'm just trying to help.
Salaam,
Faithful viewer.

 
At July 10, 2007 3:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hm...
I think about 1000 ppl are probably going to ryt soo many comments in this section, on making adjustments. As all the script writing was done, on face book, where the rest of these suggestions should have been!-I think if bro Ali has time, he could take some of the extra suggestions, and tweek some of the script(as those changes would be from the viewers too, if you get what i mean)

Its about having the viewers script up, but also gota keep it a gud video, if you have to tweek it, to make it gud, so be it inshallah!

 
At July 10, 2007 6:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dont want to sound critical but it just doesnt sound like Ali, i think u need to Ummahfilmarize it. :)

 
At July 10, 2007 7:15 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

Assalamualaykum,

The script needs more examples. Like putting a scene dialog. Like how Baba Ali acts out scenes in the workplace. Things like that. Anyway, the script will probably be good only when it is read, but I don't think it should be made into a reminder video.
Really good effort though.
Jazzakulahu Khayran

 
At July 10, 2007 7:15 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

Assalamualaykum,

The script needs more examples. Like putting a scene dialog. Like how Baba Ali acts out scenes in the workplace. Things like that. Anyway, the script will probably be good only when it is read, but I don't think it should be made into a reminder video.
Really good effort though.
Jazzakulahu Khayran

 
At July 10, 2007 8:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

pretty good..i agree with tradition becomin more important than religion and with noushin karim. defanitly make that adjustment!!
as its already been mentioned...its doesnt sound like ali. make it sound like you ali.
and we havnt really come up with a method to stay away from it. i mean most parents arent for getting married early and it makes it impossible to approach them about it. it also seems impossible for a girl to go uni and have a husband!! in the end of the day isnt he just like a friend anyway?? no one said you have to start a family straight away.

 
At July 10, 2007 11:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

VIDEO AFTER THIS ONE, BETTER BE ON RACISM :) PLSSS =D

I think we're off on a good start with the script masha'Allah. May Allah increase you Brotha. :)

 
At July 11, 2007 1:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want something more insightful, straight to the point and funny. Pretty good,just not Ali.*sigh*

 
At July 11, 2007 5:07 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

Assalamu Alaykom, I'm not real sure the frog story in the beginning is the best choice. I know in the end the authors attempted to tie it in, but the context doesnt really fit. One suggestion I would like to make is to use a story - for example, a traveler who took a wrong turn, and didnt pay attention to his GPS finder (Qur'an), and wound up in the middle of nowhere.

just a suggestion. Other than that the script is really good. I can hardly wait to see the video.

 
At July 11, 2007 6:20 AM, Blogger Suhail Sherif said...

Nice to see that we're back to useful videos. I think that this idea is nice but can be made better. How about some more constructive proof? Some Hadiths, verses that may directly or indirectly relate to the topic. That IS what is required more than the other parts.

 
At July 11, 2007 8:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Salam,

SORRY to burst your bubble but you guys should do some more research before you write a script

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boiling_frog

http://www.uga.edu/srel/ecoview11-18-02.htm

The frog story is fake so the example isn't even valid.

 
At July 11, 2007 8:22 AM, Blogger Zuleyha_Turkish said...

Aselamu Aleykum,

If it is stories you are interested in, why not look to Bediuzzaman SAID NURSI "THE WORDS." You will find some of the most beautiful and educational stories ever told.
Check out his stories here for some inspiration.

http://www.risale-inur.com.tr/rnk/eng/words/words.htm

Best of luck to all and I can't wait to see the video!

 
At July 11, 2007 8:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Burst What Bubble, Pretty Peace? lol. We are, after all, only human. It would be nice to see you working on the script with us, this next time around. It always amazes me the negativity that insues after any type of hard work is done, and the lack of compliance to help, from those who complain and point out the mistakes. lol.

 
At July 11, 2007 9:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about you just say, its not good to date and call it a day?

 
At July 11, 2007 9:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about you just say, its not good to date and call it a day?

 
At July 11, 2007 10:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

well no1s tryn to be rude abt it when theyre saying it needs tweaking, but due to all of the comments on the parts about how its gd bah needs 2 b tweaked a little bit, we should go back 2 facebook iA and start the tweaking AGAIN to mke it better iA and i suppose yh Ali should read thru and mke extra tweaks himself :)

 
At July 11, 2007 10:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is Demi:

*Pax, peeps!

It probably doesn't flow as well as his usual because we had a mandate from Ali to have one line per person. If you've ever played the kind of game in school or at camp, or on a long car trip where one person starts a story and it goes down the line, from one to the next, you see what I mean. Considering that, trust us, this story flows better than most done this way!

We talked about a couple different themes: the Sock Theme (changing gf/bf as often as you change socks); the Boiling Frog Theme (that you don't get into trouble all at once, but gradually--which connects well with the Barsisa story), and a few others.

We eventually settled on the Frog/Barsisa Theme. (lucky for Ali, because we were originally going to have someone dump a load of socks on him at the end. LOL)

As a stage direction suggestion, he could get a little stuffed Kermit the frog and a cooking pot, and playact the idea of the frog jumping out of the pot of heating water, then staying in, as he tells the Barsisa story. The monk's downfall was that he didn't "jump out of the pot" in enough time to save the girl and himself.

Halimah, Yu, and a lot of others did work very hard on this. The hardest part was in getting everyone to work together, which I have contended from the start was the whole idea of the project. But we did it. :) Thanks to all who facillitated and worked hard on this project.



*"Peace" in Latin

 
At July 11, 2007 10:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Demi again:

The "frog story" is a parable, a metaphor, not a literal history of a particular frog. (LOL)

 
At July 11, 2007 12:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why so defensive? I was just pointing out that your frog analogy is wrong because its false. How are you going to use an example which is untrue.

And where did you get the Barsisa fairytale from? I searched the web and couldn't find any Hadith that even refers to it. Is that a made up story too?

Ali, don't let these people write your scripts. They make up stories to prove their points but their stories are nothing but made up stories.

I mean are we really lacking REAL stories that we have to make up stuff to prove a point.

 
At July 11, 2007 1:39 PM, Blogger CptRatib said...

Salams,
Regarding the Barsisa story--
I have read the original story in Arabic language in the Book "Talbees Iblees" (Translation= The Devil's Deception) by Ibn al-Jawzee., indeed its a great story with many lessons. Unfortunately, a vidieo script can not do the story justice because its a long story in which the details clear up the many possibly confusing aspects of the story. The UF format just does not support that kind of length.
Some Example of possible confusion due to shortening story-
1. Why would 3 brothers 'leave' their sister with anyone if they were going away? Answer-- that was customary long ago, but in today's world that does not make sense and needs explaining.
2. How is it that Barsisa turned from a Monk to worshiping Allah? This implies Monks did not worship Allah, and that is not so. Back then, Monks did indeed worship the 1 Allah since this story happened before the Prophet Muhammad and Jesus pbuh, and the religion of worshiping the 1 Allah had not been distorted yet. This needs further explanation to clarify that we as Muslims consider all those individuals who worshiped Allah and followed their Prophet at the time as muslims with a small m, and those who follow the Last Prophet as Muslims with a campital M. The Reminder Series style does not support delving into such details to explain this.

Above are only 2 examples, and I can think of many more but I need to sum it up.

By condensing, it leaves the vid viewer possibly confused because important aspects have been left out, and these details obviously can't be included for the sake of space.

BTW-- I concur that the 'boiling frog' begining should be not be used because its a fable, and UF's style is to deal with real world examples. I and many others watch UF vids because the examples are realistic and we can relate to them on some level, but if viewers find out that the boiling-frog example is a hoax, they may loose trust in UF message.

PS I am signed on to the script writing crew on FaceBook under Halal Crispy (since I make them) and I have read everything that went back and forth. I have not conftributed because in the back of my mind, I could not forsee how the script can flow smoothly if every person contributed a line. Now that I read the script, I see how indeed it does not, and can not flow smoothly; since we are not a collective mind creating, but a collection of minds contributing.
My constructive comments-- I hope Ali and his UF crew can take the script as suggested pointers and redo it completely using UF style which has appealed to myself and so many others. Like using:
1. Real world examples
2. Shorter stories that can be justly summerized
3. Funny characters
4. Smart witty one liners
5. Shorter sentances.

These are the hallmarks of The Reminders Series, and while it was nice of Ali to ask his viewers to contribute, I do think art should be left to the artists.
Not everyone can be an artists, but an artist could come out of anyone. (yes, I stole that line from the rat animation movie I just saw yesterday which I can't spell the title of.)

 
At July 11, 2007 2:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is Demi:

Pretty Peace, thank you for the link about the boiled frogs! What this says to me is that frogs are smarter sometimes than humans, because a frog will know enough to jump OUT OF THE POT before it's too late!

 
At July 11, 2007 2:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Demi again:

BTW, I have nothing at all against frogs.

"NO FROGS WERE HARMED IN THE WRITING OF THIS SCRIPT."

 
At July 11, 2007 2:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Baba Ali, could you please comment, on what your going to do the script now and what your plans are?
Because, after all these comments, i tink many ppl who contributed to the script, probably feel like all there work, wasnt to gud!

Alot of effort was made,to get as many ppl writing as possible,but not as many ppl as was wanted were able to do so, i guess those who tried, tried there best(under the time constraints)and this was there outcome...so hope ppl can give sum constructive critizism, and bare in mind some of the hard work ppl did, to get everyone together and produce a script inshallah.

But i do think that there needs to be some changes still!-so inshallah baba Ali can post, what changes he wants to make.

 
At July 11, 2007 3:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is Demi again:

Snaa, even if the script changes, I know a lot was studied and learned in the discussions. As they say in Cali, "It's all good!"

We discussed the relationship of shirk and zina; ppl had to go and look at hadiths, and I myself, the resident Christian non-Muslim, learned a BUNCH of new Islamic vocabulary words! :)

Most importantly, we overcame disagreements and worked together. That's the important thing.

If parables don't work Islamically, (how would I know?) then I suggest we go with the Socks, with the framing device being socks tossed at Ali throughout--a visual metaphor of "some ppl change gf/bf as often as they change their socks."

This way we get to dump socks on Baba, which a lot of us were kinda looking forward to (LOL).

 
At July 11, 2007 3:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asalam alaikum,

I want to give the group who made this script 5 stars for their hard work. But as far for the content it was not that bad. But there are some mistake that should be taken care of.

1st and this is my just opinion you don’t have to change this one which is about the frog. I don’t think that’s funny at all and it dose not deal with reality. You must deal with facts and what relates to people.

2nd The statement I believe that you to rethink about this “The world used to look up to the Muslims, respect them, copy them because Islam ruled the society and now? Muslims are left with shame on their faces, copying and respecting the west because the west rules the society and people have left Islam and do not know tauheed.( (Reem Masri AKA Reemo Supreemo)”

To be honest and fair and correct. Muslim were respected because they had an Islamic state that ruled by Quran and Sunnah and that system reflected on the society, that’s why the whole world respected the equality and justice of Islam, Today we don’t have that.

Only the west rules the world with secularism and made laws and because of its financial status and power in the world we look up to them.

There is a dangerous statement here, I believe the word has to be re- arranged from people left Islam and don’t know their tawheed to “they don’t understand Islam” and the Aqeedha. Because when you say they left Islam that means they become KAFIRS?!


3rd “ Upon finding out that their daughter or son is involved in a girlfriend-boyfriend situation, parents so fearful of being shamed in front of their community practice honor killings”

That is not a common practice among Muslims, I am not saying not to state the fact and hide what Muslims do. No! but this statement is not true- it happens in very few rural areas, so this is miss leading about Muslims to say we all practice honor killing.

Suggestions:

This topic should be very easy. BF & GF relation is haram because Islam says so. There is no need to prove or exaggerate. Some people live with that relation and they are doing OK, so what should we tell them. Islam dictates what is wrong and right in this LIFE. And to say the shahada is enough, because one you say that it means you submitted your feelings, you desire, yourself to the creator and to follow the Prophet SAW as a whole.

Jazakum Allah for all you efforts. Please think about what I said.

Your Bro in Islam,

Abu Amira

 
At July 11, 2007 4:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ummm i know some of you put your efforts into making it ali style. but the frog doesnt work. it doesnt. like its not an accident that a frog got into a pot. and then someone clicked on the oven. as if the person didnt know that it was going to get out of hand. the analogy doesnt work. maybe you should reference how life in america is very influential. peer pressure. everyone is doing it. and then again that stupid idea that its "cool" to be rebellious to what you know your parents dislike. or even to one's religion. religion is serious. islam is total submission and its a serious thing when one can keep cutting corners for their lusts and compromise their place in the after life. you end up losing your own self respect without even knowing it. its wrong and you''l feel that its worng eventually. it'll catch up with you. pple need to identify themselves as muslims and al'hamdullillah apart from the rest. you know the consequences of having a girlfriend or a boyfriend and Allah know whats in your hearts so dont think your fooling anyone but yourselves. plus with the way pple are today trading "partners" like its a tag team wrestling match or a free for all how do you know what they have. they could have diseases and the like. be careful. ya use the analogy of someone taking an innocent shortcut to the bodego and then geting robbed of all thier money. they should have taken the safer road, and they knew that the allet behind the bodego was unsafe at night. so why did they go? becasue they didnt want to walk around the extra block to the store. so whats it going to be...one more block. or getting robbed? in hooking" up its the risk of getting robbed of self respect and well there i'm done. sorry for it being so long.

 
At July 11, 2007 4:10 PM, Blogger sckma said...

Assalam

I was kinda hoping that ALi would take the script and change it so it would flow, and it be his terminology. All credit to those who contributed, especially given the work that was required to make everyne co-operate :P.

 
At July 11, 2007 4:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asalam alaikum,

One more thing the so called Basira story is not even a hadith. Its fabricated. You should use the hadith of KULWAH where when 2 people (opposite sex are alone and the shytan is the 3rd person) that should be enough.

Jazakum Allah

 
At July 11, 2007 4:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bismillah

Assalaam Alaikum warahmatuhlahi wabarakatuh

Qadr Allah wa ma shea fael. Its the decree of Allah. Alhamdulillah, its better to know the critiques, now then be harmed by them later. I know everyone is wandering about the script. I am trying to re negotiate the terms in which the script is to be written under lol. I feel this way, the frog thing can go, and we need to start over completely. I think the critiquing, fact findings and general complaints have been good for all of us, insha Allah. I sincerely hope this time around, there will be more work done of the assignments I give and full participation from everyone.

I had no idea that the script would be put out for such public humiliation, or I would not have given it to Ali. I apologize if anyone has had their feelings hurt from their lines being picked apart as they were. I am the leader of this project so alhamdulillah all the mistakes are my own and are to be bared by me alone; which is one of the hardships in being a leader. I apologize for not writing earlier in a public manner on my feelings of this matter I forgot that as the leader, I need to share my thoughts.

halimah bint David

 
At July 11, 2007 8:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ali??? are you there bro???

 
At July 11, 2007 8:22 PM, Blogger Baba Ali said...

I apologize for being out of the loop. I have been writing the Season Finale as the deadline for the DVD is approaching.

As you guys are seeing, this process is not as easy as it seems lol. I have gone through 18 times so far and the tough part is each time make a good video or have a good script...the bar is raised (and then people expect it to be better the next time around).

The most important thing when it comes to the script is to make sure that is as accurate as possible. Next, you want it to be intersting enough that viewer is there at the end of the video. Of course, you can never make everyone happy and with nearly two million video views, you are going to hear all kinds of feedback. At the end of the day, we have to remember what is most important, pleasing Allah (swt). The purpose of the feedback is to help us whoever is working on the project to make it better (that is why I specifically said give "constructive criticism" instead of just criticism.

I have purposely tried to stay out of this loop since I wanted the script to be exclusively by the viewers. If you guys want, I can participate as a viewer in the rewrite of the script InshAllah.

Just remember to keep your intention straight and don't take any of the feedback personally. Yeah sometimes people sound mean but I don't think anyone's intention is to hurt anyone here. I think people are more straightforward on the net since you don't have to be "politically correct" and you can post anonymously. Nevertheless, the feedback is useful and can help with the rewrite InshAllah.

I have to agree with the sister though. When she was trying to recruit people to help with the script, only a handful participated while there was no shortage of people ready to critique (but that is a whole video subject on its own if you know what I sayin')

Ali

 
At July 11, 2007 8:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

there u r!!!

well yeh i think u should defanitely add a bit here n there...jus so ur essence is present :)

as for contributin...i cant seem to. little help anyone???

 
At July 12, 2007 4:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think that this is a great script and it should be rewritten before making it into a video.

The problems of having random people just write one line each is clear. In real TV comedies, the writers work together in a small team. But the one thing is that they are all on the same wavelength and have the same bit of humor. (if that makes sense) Here on the internet, you have people who have different ideas of what is funny etc or even different ideas of what should be included in such a video; therefore you are going to get a script that seems to not flow together smoothly.

I think that before this is completed there needs to be one person, say Ali, to do the final rewrite and make it fit according the Ummah Films standards.

Also, I agree with those who think that frog story is a bad choice. At the beginning of it I just thought 'what is this about?'.

I will repeat once again, the thing that made this videos good was that Ali used real world examples and this made everyone relate to them. This needs to be done here.

This is a very serious issue and I think that this video, as it is written now, will not do it justice. You should include the fact that while you are committing zina, your Iman is removed from you and floats above your head like a cloud. And if you were to die while committing zina, you die as a kaffir and the muslims are not allowed to perform the funeral prayer on your body. That is how serious this is!

Also, you need to mention something about what the muslim youth do to hide their zina and relationships. Such as this TRUE story: A young muslim girl tested positive for HIV. They asked her if she had ever had sex and she said no. They examined her and she was still a virgin. The parents couldn't figure out what was up. Here, they later found out that she had a secret boyfriend and was having anal sex, which is haram even when you are married, so that she would still be a 'virgin'!

And there are many others. I think the problem is that the writers of this script are young (no offensive) and this limits their writing ablities do to their lack of life experience.

 
At July 12, 2007 6:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Assalamulikum,

Its a very good effort by all people..but i don't think it really concentrates on the topic. It needs to cover all the aspects of the problem and issues... Like how parents don't have time(or are to modern or high class or are trying to live in a americanized society) to teach their kids about what Islam says about dating and way it is not allowed. And another thing is that sometimes kids are ignored by family, and close relative (and sometimes kids don't have any siblings etc.) and they feel lonely and need somebody to talk to all the time and thats how they get involved in this stuff.

These are just a few things in my opinion, but there are many more things. Coming to America at a young age i faced all these pressures but Masha'Allah i had three elder sister who were there to help.

Anyways back to the topic the point about dating and breaking up and dating again is very good.. I just don't understand how people can share everything with one person and when something goes wrong between them..then its time to find someone new...this concept is what makes me feel wierd inside. I doesn't make sense to me but hey there all all types of different people who have different feelings.

I hope i didn't offend anyone..

JazakAllah Khair

 
At July 12, 2007 9:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comments actually VERY long but inshaAllah will b herd *embarassed face*

i agree with mostly evre1 else and think that together we should re-write the script (not from dead scratch) but mainly by FIRST taking out the stories in it so far (i.e. the frog story and the Barsisa hadith thing) and replace them with SHORT, but effective hadiths and mainly real life stories such as the example abt the HIV positive girl.

Real life examples should be given such as why a boy/girl would WANT a gf/bf and the main answers are: bcoz they feel the need to be at the same level as all of their mates and want to "fit in", and they want sum1 to talk to and stuff like that (like said before) and OBVIOUSLY because after pubity, theres a higher interest in the opposite gender... :| lol

jst for a bit of extra adding (just a little suggestion) u no the episode on i think culture vs islam - (rllyy gd episode and completely true tht the title mde me burst in 2 a fit). Well in that episode i think Ali was imitating a father saying "whatt aree wee going too dooo?!" after he herd his daughter say "But i love him..." lol, u culd bring in something like that again and then b like
"Aahhh see see, thts wt happens wen ur children arent brought up with Islam taught to them properly" or something like that (not actually sure tht fits with this subject) and anotha suggestion is that Ali could bring in the whole real life topic about TRUST between parents and their children. How children get the trust naturally bt then break it by having a bf/gf, or behind their parents back, they abuse their parents trust and tke advantage of it, while in front of their parents they try to increase their trust so they can get up to worse stuff behind their parents backs. This is a real life situation in nearly all the teenagers i have met in my life. But some people dont trust their children from the first place bcoz they r scared tht their children r gna go off and find a bf/gf, but in most cases that i have seen, the parents double-secure the girls life and cage it up, while they "secure" the boys life and let them go out wenever they want bt they must 'always have their fone switchd on and must get home by maghrib'. Very unfair situation which i have seen ALOT and thnk its silly bcoz tht means the parents dont trust their OWN upbringing and also brings back the topic of "its equally bad for girls AND boys to have a partner before marriage".

Extremely sorry for the LOOONNGGG comment but i was jst dying to fit some in. i still have more hehe bt im gna stop for now..
JazakAllah Khair, and cant w8 2 rewrite if we do inshaAllah.
Could sum1 let us kno plz if it is on facebook? (the re-write, if their is 1)

 
At July 12, 2007 9:44 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bismillah

Assalaam Alaikum

Do you feel that the last script was horrible? Fed up with lazy Muslims? Do you have something to complain about with the last script?

Then come on over to facebook, where you can make a difference to the world, today!

Ummah Films on Facebook
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=3118210639

You must prove your worth in having the priviledge to help write a Ummah Films script by doing this assignment:

Do this assignment that I have given to everyone in Ummah films group on facebook.

You must watch Ummah films 25,000 weddings
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxghRPfkJMQ

and

Ummah films dating online
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTn4RFpDxOg&mode=related&search=

Post your notes in the discussion board called: Watching Ummah films.

halimah bint David

 
At July 12, 2007 10:40 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'M IN! YAAAYY! :D! MashaAllah.

 
At July 12, 2007 1:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

yup, i think we should inshallah re-write it, using the existing script.And i do think BABA ALI, SHOULD DO THE FINAL EDITING,MAYBE WITH THE REST OF US OR ON HIS OWN, BUT SHOULD BE INVOLVED PROPERLY, WITH ALL THE VIEWERS, TO MAKE IT A UMMAH FILMS REMINDER VIDEO inshallah.

 
At July 12, 2007 4:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i love the last line. well said and so true.

 
At July 12, 2007 8:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

commiting zina does not make you a kaffir but yes it is a very serious sin!

 
At July 12, 2007 8:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

(sigh)
i cant get on the face book.
anyone kno wat mite b wrong???

 
At July 12, 2007 9:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Did you make a face book account?

 
At July 12, 2007 10:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asalam alaikum everyone,

Jazakum Allah for all the comments. We really appreciate all the feedback. The leader of the face book group and the members spent some time to finish this project. Some of us worked on proofs, some of us worked on suggestions and most of us worked on the script, Wa lhamdulilalh. Over all we all did our best.

Others joined the group to show their support even though they were not able to contribute on the script. But thanks to Allah and all the memmbers who joined this project for their support.

We enjoyed this project because it was a learning process for us. I would love to request all the brothers & sisters who put these comments to join us at the face book account. Please! help us.

Our leader of the group is Sister Halimah Bint David. Please lets follow her guide lines so we all can be on the same page.

If you have anything in your mind, ideas or suggestions then please feel free to post. All your honest comments were excellent, we all need you help please. Jazakum Alalh.

 
At July 13, 2007 3:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Assalamualaikum

This was a good attempt mashallah :-) but it was a little choppy; needs to flow a little bit more. Also, I would suggest adding more about WHY it is wrong to have a boyfriend/girlfriend; the reasoning behind it. I liked the switching partners like socks! Something along those lines; adding more to that same thought and the one that says we should look for ONE partner only.

I also liked how it was mentioned that fiance's are not halal. That would also be nice to emphasize/elaborate on.

Maybe some hadeeth or Quran verses too would help?

Good job!
Keep working inshAllah!
:-)

Assalamualaikum

 
At July 13, 2007 6:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

AOA,
THIS IS AMAZING :D... sorry abt b4 i just read the begining the wrong way..haha.. my bad.

Salam,
hira

 
At July 13, 2007 9:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ye i did but it just wont let me on.

 
At July 13, 2007 10:32 PM, Blogger elle said...

Assalamu aleikum
So..it is just parents responsability?they most to find us husband/wife quicly and thats all?
We deal with a lot of experiences in life (u know what i m saying?)for reduce the hole thing on that.
And the topic was dating? it is correct or not..what we most to do for make it halal..can be halal dating?

 
At July 14, 2007 2:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

can ppl plz add themselves to face book, and start writing, and turn this script arnd, and make it really gud!

Alota ppl have commented, plz PARTICIPATE in the script inshallah!

 
At July 14, 2007 2:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

can ppl plz add themselves to face book, and start writing, and turn this script arnd, and make it really gud!

Alota ppl have commented, plz PARTICIPATE in the script inshallah!

 
At July 16, 2007 5:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Assalamu 3laykum wara7matullah

I totally agree with Noushin Karim and love the part that she put in(repeat till exhaustion takes ova) that will be a Very funny part especially if Ali does it his way and I really would like to see the socks bit, it would be a hilarious bit if its done right at the end and Ali does his finale(reminding you just in case you forgot)then he should put some ayyat and hadits like previous videos to "spice the cake" lol:D. Sorry but another suggestion would be to put some examples of young gals and guys, galabantin around with bf/gf and parents goin sik wiv worry. Im not american so I wouldnt no anytn that goes on but here in England we have the highest rate of teenage pregnancies in EUROPE!Anywayz excellent effort by Halimah bint david and the rest can't wait to see the finale, salaamz
Young sis in Islam :)

 
At July 16, 2007 12:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asalam alaikum everyone,

I was at face book group and didn’t see enough people contributing for the script. We are working together and doing everything by ourselves again- this is not fair to us. Please help us.

Come on join us and start helping us with the script, I beg you all. We worked so hard on this we are still by ourselves. We need your help. Jazakum Allah.

 
At July 18, 2007 7:22 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

MashALLAH its amazing to c all the effort put in all brothers and sisters contributing,hope this video is a great success,honestly the frog part was very confusing,you should give examples which are easier for people to understand.

 
At July 18, 2007 7:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Asalamualikum people,
i think the nxt topic should be on ZAKAT,which is a left out topic yet one of the 5 pillars of Islam.There is so mch poverty in the world today n somewhere or the other we are responsible becoz we dint pay our zakat.If we start to religiously pay ZAKAT every year,them InshALLAH the poverty in the world will decrease and many people will rise above the poverty line or atleast not starve!remember ALLAH(S.W.T),ALL MIGHTY made us priviledged to help our other brothers out,i hope we all help nour brothers in need(ameen)

 

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